Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger Wants to Know: Would you Have Sex with Him in This Bathroom?

(On 6/9/10, the Georgia Bureau of Investigation (GBI) released over 50 photos related to the Roethlisberger case. Pictured above is the bathroom in Milledgeville where little Ben got Big Ben into trouble. And no, the irony is not lost on us that the pictures were released on '69' day (6/9/10). The GBI, does in fact, have a since of humor)

Three months ago, Ben Roethlisberger was accused of sexual assault.

Chances are, when you first heard about the story you asked yourself three questions:

1. Shouldn't it be easy for someone worth $100 million to get laid?

2. If I cheer for the Steelers in 2010, does that mean I'm cheering for sexual assault?

3. If Roethlisberger and Lindsay Lohan had a child, would it get drunk every night and sexually assault itself?

4. If you're a girl, you're probably wondering what the victim was wearing, because girls think about stuff like that.

5. And if you're a guy, you probably wondered if the girl was hot, why? Because thats all guys care about.

Well, your favorite Pro-Cincinnati, anti-Roethlisberger/Steelers blog on the internet is going to answer all of those questions with short, simple concise sentences.
1. You would think so.
2. Yes.
3. Most likely.
4. See picture below.
5. The victim's face is blurred out, so we're going to judge her based completely on her body.

As you can clearly see in the picture below, the only person that should have been arrested on March 5 was Ben's accuser, if her dress isn't a crime against fashion, then we don't know what is. (She is posing with the Steeler's Willie Colon in this picture).

Is it just us, or in the picture below, does Ben's face scream "I don't care if its with a guy, a girl or an animal, but I am going to have sex in a bathroom stall tonight,"

As you can plainly see, the VIP areas in Milledgeville bars are rivaled by only those in Las Vegas. This is the roped off area where Ben and his friends were treating underage girls to shots of patron.

For those of you that found this site when you googled "Lindsay Lohan, Illegitimate child, Las Vegas Strip Club, cocaine line with a pirate," you know who you are, you're the people who don't know who Ben Roethlisberger is.

Our lawyer said we have to tell you that Ben was never charged for sexual assault in this case, only accused. However, Ben did admit to having consensual sexual contact with the victim in the bathroom pictured at the top of the page.

1 comment:

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