Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Bengals-Vikings: The Blog Will be Live From the Metrodome Sunday When the Bengals Beat Down the Vikings

In case you've somehow lost track, the Bengals are currently winning division titles at a rate of 1 every 18 years (which is about how often Tiger Woods is going to get laid if he stays married). That means if you were born after 1991 and you're a Bengals fan, your life has either sucked or you've jumped on the Steelers bandwagon. Let's rephrase that, your life either sucks or you deserve to die.

However, that can all change this week. With a win Sunday over the Vikings, the division title rate could double to a once unfathomable 2 every 18 years. And just think, the spoiled bastards born after 2000 will start believing that division titles are normal. INSIC still hasn't decided if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Anyway, this blog only has two rules: One, if the Bengals are playing for a division title, we go to the game. Two, if they're playing a team with purple as a team color, we go to the game so we can beat the piss out of the all male fans for wearing a girl's color.

What point are we trying to make here? The blog will be live in Minnesota Sunday as the Bengals try to clinch the AFC North title. The last time we covered a game, this draft diary/incoherent ramble was produced.

We expect more of the same come Sunday night.

On a side note, INSIC would like to apologize for not producing a victory video after Sunday's win over Detroit. We felt that making a video after a win over the Lions would be like burning down a homeless shelter. It would be in very poor taste.

Rest assured that the victory video will be back Sunday and keep in mind that there's a good chance it will be filmed from a Minneapolis jail cell.

For old time's sake, here are the prior videos:

Week 1: Loss to Broncos
Week 3: Win over Steelers
Week 4: Win over Browns
Week 5: Win over Ravens
Week 10: Win over Steelers
Week 12: Win over Browns

Coming later this week: Bengals-Vikings top three games ever.

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