Tuesday, October 26, 2010

If Ochocinco and Deion Sanders Daughter Reproduced, the Baby Would Win the Heisman Before it was in Preschool

Ninety-seven percent of NFL players agree, there's only three ways to get over a tough loss:

1. Go to a strip club and stare at boobs for 15 hours. If there are no strip clubs around, then find the nearest senior citizens home and stare at old lady boobs, which are almost as nice.

2. Smoke a quarter-pound of marijuana*

*= If Randy Moss isn't on your team, you probably will not have access to a quarter-pound of marijuana, in which case an eighth will do.

and of course, let us not forget number three:

3. Take a picture with a semi-famous hot chick who happens to be related to Deion Sanders.

Because Ocho hates boobs and weed, he went with option number three to get over Sunday's loss to the Falcons: Yup, that's Ochocinco and Deion's daughter in the picture at the top of the page.

If you're an NFL owner reading this and you find out these two are having a baby, it would probably be in your best interests to sign the kid to a 91-year, $4-billion contract. That is, unless the baby is a girl because then it would only be athletic enough to play for the Bills.

Because we haven't posted in a week, we're including a bonus picture of Deiondra in a bikini. You're welcome. Oh and we are not messing with you at all, her name is Deiondra. Apparently Deion Sanders only knows eight letters of the alphabet, that or he hates his daughter.

(If you're one of the six Bengals fans that reads mediatakeout.com, then you may have heard that Ocho and Deiondra went out on a date after Sunday's game. However, unless they had a 15-minute Big Mac date at McDonald's --which is possible, because this is Chad we're talking about after all-- the date didn't happen. Chad left the locker room about an hour after the game (when this picture was taken) and was on a plane back to Cincinnati about 90 minutes after that.)


  1. That girl is an ugly bitch. She has been in more than 10 relationships. I wonder if she were to be beautiful

    1. you are an inbred moron

  2. I have just downloaded iStripper, so I can watch the hottest virtual strippers on my taskbar.